I don’t enjoy arguing. Not even with my wife.
Although I love the truth and have attempted to make it a big part of who I am, I’m not that threatened by people who disagree.
You might call it apathy; I’d call it wisdom.
Apathy equals not caring. Apathy doesn’t care about truth, nor about others. Apathetic people don’t argue because they’ve abandoned all concern for anything and anyone.
That’s not me. I care. I care a lot. It’s because I care that I often don’t argue.
I care about people’s souls and I care about the truth. I want to know the truth and I want to rescue those who are drowning in lies.
But many who are drowning in lies consider themselves to be out for a nice swim. They don’t think they are drowning at all. In fact, they think I am the one in trouble because I won’t jump in the water with them.
There are non-apathetic people on the other side of the issues. They care just as much as I do. And we disagree.
I don’t like to argue with those who are 100% convinced in their belief. I consider it to be a waste of time. Atheists and Calvinists are frequently 100% convinced they are right. I see no point and get no enjoyment out of arguing with them.
Quite honestly, I don’t believe I am 100% right. I believe I am 87% right, I leave enough caution to make me hesitate before launching into others.
I think this is where wisdom comes in. I’ve lived with me for many years. I’ve been wrong before. I will be wrong again. I have been humbled many times. I’d like to avoid further humiliation, which is most easily done by being quiet.
Wise people pick their battles. They also know who to battle, not just what to battle over. There is a time to be all things to all men so that by all means I might win some.
If we have people’s souls in mind, proving ourselves intellectually right might drop down a peg or two.
In the end, I might be completely wrong on this, but it at least explains why I do not seek out arguments, nor do I enjoy them, nor desire to prolong them.
If I do argue with you, it’s hopefully because there is an important issue being discussed and I think you are intellectually curious enough to listen, or that I might be able to learn something.
If I do not argue with you, it’s because
1) I don’t know what you’re talking about
2) I honestly have no opinion
3) I don’t see an edifying point in proving I am right. I am concerned for your soul, therefore other things are more important than bashing you into intellectual submission
4) I think we actually agree (very rare, but it happens)
5) I’ve determined you are a lost cause. Enjoy your ride!