Christian Super Bowl Pick

All year we have seen God’s hand guiding the fortunes of the Steelers and the Seahawks. The Steelers represented industrialization and the Seahawks represent Microsoft and Bill Gates. God showed, as if we needed more proof, that God is a capitalist and a Republican.

But now God’s two favored teams face off–industrialization vs. computers. Seattle is a very heathen area, supposedly the most unchurched population in America. God will judge that no doubt. But wait, Pat Robertson said people in PA would be smitten for denying intelligent design in their classrooms. Bummer, we’re stuck.

Both teams have guys who thank God for their success. We also know that Christian pastors don’t like the Super Bowl, perhaps God doesn’t either. Some pastors are protesting the game this year, God might too. Could this be the first ever tie? Then again, if it’s a blowout, no one will watch, make all those church skippers feel dumb for skipping.

Steelers 34
Seahawks 17

End of the End of the Spear

Jason Janz, a Denver pastor is encouraging Christians to boycott the film “End of the Spear” because it stars a gay actor.

“My concern is not so much that the actor was gay, it was his activism that concerned me,” Janz told The Denver Post on Thursday. “Many homosexuals have starred in Christian movies in the past. … He is perhaps one of the foremost spokesmen for the gay agenda in Hollywood. “When a character’s personal life overshadows the character, in this case a missionary, it harms the message of the film,” Janz said.

He’s free to boycott what he wants but to say that “many homosexuals have starred in Christian movies” is just silly. Like who? I don’t get that. If you’re going to boycott, at least have the guts to make sense with your explanation. Even Focus on the Family liked the movie. I mean come on, if they liked it, that means Jesus likes it.

Organist Gone Wild

A man climbed a bell tower in Massachusetts tonight to protest the demolition of a Catholic church in Holyoke. He sat seven stories high for 20 minutes, before coming down on his own. Witnesses say he’s a former organist at the church and upset at the Diocese for its decision to tear the church down. He was arrested and charged with trespassing.

20 whole minutes, he must have been pretty sincere. Hope it works out for him. No doubt this will change the Catholic Church’s mind, or rather, God’s mind as they are one and the same.

Been Laden With Sin?

The National Black Fine Art Show in the Puck Building in New York has received some criticism over one of its paintings on display. Someone had “big problems with a painting by Harlem artist “Tafa”. It depicts an upside down Christ-like figure with a face strongly resembling Osama Bin Laden.”

This “someone” is a Christian type. Guess what emotion this Christian type feels over this painting? Not only did he feel this emotion once, but twice! Very emotive. Here is the expression of his innermost feelings

“This is outrageous. This is an attack against my religion. How can an artist go so low? Most people are outraged, most Christians.” Oh yes! He’s outraged! He’s one of us! Join the clan of the outraged and become outraged too. Just one glimpse of this photo will send you into outrageous levels of outrage.

The Passion of the Pat

In the interview Thursday, Robertson noted that he often gets ideas for commentaries from the news department at CBN and said that “I do editorials. … Unfortunately, my passion runs ahead of me.” Robertson said that the “context of what I say isn’t quite as strong as it sounds, but I am passionate about things, and it is not politically correct.”

“I believe we’re in the middle of a great religious revival in America,” he told interviewer Robin Roberts. After Roberts observed that he seemed like he was “on his best behavior” Thursday, Robertson replied: “I’m talking to somebody nice like you. I don’t want to put my foot in my mouth. I’m not on my own show.”

So, if a moron knows he’s a moron, is he still a moron? So I guess we’re just supposed to “understand” that Robertson speaks through the foot in his mouth and forgive him for saying that God is killing people and we should kill people and so forth. How do we know when he’s being passionate and when he’s speaking for God? If it happens it was from God; if it doesn’t it was from passion?

Why not try keeping your mouth shut until you get it figured out Pat.

Flinging Spears

Britney Spears, who is set to outrage Christians on Will and Grace the day before Good Friday (Sometimes known as Good Friday Eve or Not Nearly as Good Thursday), is switching religions. Again.

Spears was raised as a Baptist. Then she switched to Kabbalah for awhile with Madonna and now she has been seen attending a Hindu temple in Malibu.

She “is said to have been welcomed at the Malibu Temple by its president Nadadur Varadhan. He apparently explained to her the tenets of Hinduism as also the significance of the various rituals. “She showed a lot of interest in the religion and was quite fascinated by the prasadam offered by the temple in the form of puliogere [tamarind rice] and sadam [cooked rice],” Mr. Varadhan said in an e-mail message. He said she had promised to return to the temple and made a commitment to conduct more elaborate pujas in the near future.”

Im sure she did. I feel as if I’m on the verge of being funny but I can’t quite decide which angle to approach here. I’ll leave it up to you I guess.

Just Reporting the News

A London couple started a sex store for conservative Christian married types. “We have been expecting a storm of protest over what we’re doing, but we’ve had no negative feedback so far. In fact we’ve had a lot of orders from vicars themselves.”

Oh, just wait. Now that I’ve told the world about it, outrage is coming.

Knowledge Isn’t Evil

We know better.

We read one book on the church and tell our pastor how he should run the church. We hear a verse that appeals to our feelings, rip it out of context, and use it to excuse our stupidity. We judge God based on our experience rather than what He’s told us. We take the advice of older believers and criticize them for not understanding, chalking them up as cold-hearted know-it-alls who don’t have the Spirit.

On and on we go, feeling assured, while tripping toward hell, denying that it’s getting hotter. It is absolutely tragic the weapons that Satan uses to defeat people. He gets people upset with God and His Word, making them feel like they should be experiencing something, not learning.

Yet the Bible talks all over the place about knowledge, learning, and wisdom. Let this mind be in you which was also in Christ Jesus. Be not conformed to this world but be transformed by the renewing of your mind. With my flesh I serve the law of sin but with my mind the Law of God. Bring every thought captive unto Jesus Christ. Think on things above, not on things of the earth. Grow in the grace and knowledge of our Lord Jesus Christ.

Yet with all the Bible has to say on this, we smartly conclude that “Knowledge puffs up, man. I just love.”

Give me a break.

The above is from my new e-book Deer Pants for the Water. There’s much more coming on this subject and many others. It’s fun stuff. To get your own copy send me an email at jcweddle1 at juno.com and you’ll find out how knowledge and love are dependent on each other and there are dangers to gravitating towards one or the other.

Plagiarism!

Calligrapher and Queen’s scribe Donald Jackson is producing the first handwritten Bible since the invention of the printing press. Mr Jackson, based in Monmouthshire, is five years into the eight-year, £2m project commissioned by Benedictine monks in the United States.

Mr Jackson, scribe to the Crown Office since 1964, uses hand-carved goose quills to write on calfskin parchment. Finished pages are gilded with 24-carat gold leaf and bound in leather and Welsh oak.

Wow, I gotta get me a job like that. Is it just me or does this seem like a colossal waste of time?

Forgive as God Has Forgiven Eh

Convinced that one of his attorneys is Jesus Christ, George Banks has insisted for years that his death sentence has been vacated by God and he’s being illegally held. The delusions are among many the highly psychotic inmate has maintained for decades, Luzerne County prosecutors and Banks’ defense attorneys agree. But are they proof he’s incompetent to be executed?

Banks has been charged with killing 13 people, including his own five kids. “Banks, 63, has repeatedly maintained his sins have been pardoned by God, and he no longer faces execution – a belief that shows he has no understanding that he is facing execution.” Ah ya feel bad for people.

Poor guy. Ah, kill him. I’ve never understood why a person who is mentally incapable of understanding that killing is wrong should be treated more lightly! Isn’t that more reason to do him in? I see the intent of the law but still. Yes, I am for the death penalty. No, I would not be able to do it myself. I’m mentally incapable of doing so.

What Up Gawd!

The Church of England is still trying to figure out how to get people into their churches. Their new plan calls for ordaining a special group of priests who will be equipped and trained to hang out in skate parks, pubs and arcades to attract the youth.

Rev Robert Marshall, a spokesman for Fresh Expressions, said they would form “a dynamic new force” who “will be able to reach parts that other clergy might not be able to reach”.

Reverend Marshall was put in charge of this because his name is close to being Marshall Mathers, aka Slim Shady, aka Eminem. The youths will like that. WhaWha! Peace.

Agape Means Love

Some people in Lake Worth are calling a church dangerous and hazardous to their health. Residents in a small neighborhood there are gearing up to fight to keep the church out of their backyards.

The battle has been going on for two years. The guy wanting to build the church is pastor of Agape United Church of God. He claims the building is built for 270 people. Residents say it would fit 1,600! A local police officer says it would be impossible to get emergency vehicles down the streets if people came to the church.

Kirkham [resident] said he’s also skeptical of Thomas [pastor] because his former congregation took him to court and sued him when he attempted to sell the church and put the proceeds into his pocket. “He sought to dissolve the church and used the proceeds to fund his retirement,” said Kirkham.

The guy sounds like a real winner. I’m sure his church will be too. All for God brother!

Grace Is Better Than We Think

We’re never happy.

God’s been dealing with this from us for thousands of years, our finding fault with His work, our complaining and grumbling about life. He offers us a great position, a position of honor and glory, perfection even. He says, “I know you are spiritually poor. I want you to be spiritually rich.” Christ became poor so we could be rich. He left heaven to come to earth so that we who are on earth could go to heaven. Cool. Boy, that’s so stinking happy.

We can’t let it stop at happy. So we take “grace,” the word that explains what God has so greatly done for us, and warp it. “Grace” now means, “undeserved favor.” Some say “unmerited favor.” Others say, “God gave us a gift we don’t deserve.” Ooh, how negative. I like it.

But sometimes life gets tiresome when all we do is find fault with it. Wouldn’t it be nice to find something happy? The happiest word in the Bible is “grace.” And we ruined it.

We already feel bad because we’re sinners. We’ve already hit rock bottom–that’s why we came to Christ in the first place. Guilt was grinding us into the ground. We gradually gravitate toward grace, hoping it’s the happiness we desire, only to find out that grace just adds more burden.

I already felt bad about myself, now I feel horrible. Underserved favor. God gave me something I don’t deserve. Every time I see the word “grace” in the Bible I am reminded of the fact that I don’t deserve it. God is holding it over my head.

I have heard in church many times that “loving someone doesn’t necessarily mean you like them.” I get this notion when I think of how God loves me. “You know, you don’t deserve grace. He doesn’t have to be nice to you, you know. Oh sure, God loves you, but He doesn’t really like you. He’s putting up with you.”

This is a snippet from Deer Pants for the Water: Things You May Have Missed in the Bible. If you would like your own free copy, contact me at jcweddle1 at juno.com to get it.

End of the Spear Part Too

Just days after canceling “The Book of Daniel,” NBC may have found another way to anger the Christian community.
The network said Britney Spears will play a conservative Christian on “Will & Grace.” On the April 13 episode, the pop star is to portray a Christian sidekick to gay talk show host Jack McFarland (Sean Hayes). When Jack’s fictional network, Out TV, is bought by a Christian TV network, Spears contributes a cooking segment called “Cruci-fixins.”

Yup, I’m outraged. I thought for a minute that I wasn’t but then it just came and now there it is. Total outrage. A TV show I’ve never seen has offended me by continuing to be not watched by me.

Uh-Oh!

Chad Allen is an actor in the movie End of the Spear. He plays Nate Saint. After offering him a contract, Chad revealed to the movie team that he was a homosexual. He has even lobbied for gay rights and gay marriage. However, the movie team felt it right that they keep their end of the contract and not fire him.

Green said that learning of Allen’s homosexuality presented the Every Tribe team with “an obvious dilemma,” but that after discussing it with director Jim Hanon, writer/producer Bill Ewing, and Steve Saint, who served as a consultant for the film that tells his father’s story, all agreed they should keep their word and honor the contract that had been offered.

In an e-mail to Christianity Today Movies, Saint said, “I could not imagine how something like this could slip through a professional screening process.” He continued, “After I got over the emotional shock of realizing that a man who has chosen to live a lifestyle in stark contrast to my dad’s would actually be playing his role in End of the Spear, I realized I would likely be held responsible for that decision. I wanted the issue to go away. Finally, I realized I was going to have to face what was happening, and there was little chance of coming out unscathed.”

Just so you know, I am using tremendous restraint in not making any jokes about this subject in relationship to the name of the movie. Wouldn’t even think of doing that. In fact, I don’t even know what I meant by saying that.

Not So Super Bowl

A Group of lay-preachers called “Citizens Against Super Bowl Idolatry” will attend the February 5, Super Bowl (outside), but warns the American public about the “deeper implications of Super Bowl idolatry in American life … ,” according to Birmingham activist lawyer, James Leonard Elsman.

“Hey, we are not party-poopers, but this whole event has become nonsensical in view of realities. We will bring some experienced Street- Preachers into Detroit to protest this unbalanced idolatry, with banners all around Ford Field. America’s foremost Street-Preacher, Ruben Israel Chavez, will lead the group of 35+ preachers.”

They have 8 points that they are upset about, reasons to not watch the Super Bowl. One of them is that Detroit has a bad football team, which, although that’s a valid point, not sure what that has to do with anything.

Concluded Elsman with a wink, “More and more in America, especially regarding the overturning of Roe v. Wade, preaching will be done outside where people congregate. God used an ass to speak in the Bible. Our guys can do the job, just as well.” Ah yes, wink, wink.

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